The Confusion in the Head.

Do you ever feel like you give your all to someone who just takes you completely for granted? I'm sure you have. I'm sure you were angry, hurt, and just kept questioning as to why. Honestly, because why in the world would someone push away your good favors and brush you off like you are nothing to them and have never done anything in your life? Well, I am completely and insanly sure that this is the way that God feels about me. I used to be the girl who was in love with Him, just Him & only Him. My worldly desires have gotten the best of me lately. Don't get me wrong, I love my God. I do not honor Him the way he diserves though. Why? Because I'm human. I know what's right, yet I do what's wrong. Romans 7 describes perfectly the way I feel.

School's hard but it's good. I've found out I am a science/math person, and I'm a fan of this discovery. My friends at school, even though I don't see them as much anymore are most definitly awesome. They get me through it. Haha, we're having a Bones marathon this weekend. And you know dats rightttt.

My weekends been good. Spent it with my BFF & going to soccer tournaments. My last "3" games ever. Not that I played anything but goalie. It was cool though. Our team has surely improved, I just wish I could have been out on that field. These headaches make me mad, but not as mad as when I hear my brother telling me he's also getting them when he plays. I'd rather take that hit. Our team came in 3rd in our flight, not that we diserved it. Haha. Zukies team also came in 3rd, but trust me, they diserved second. That reff was the devil. Stupid woman. Whatever, hopefully he'll be playing club next year and will get a break. I had fun this weekend. I am SO soar, sunburnt, & tired. I really wanted to break my leg. At least I'll never stop being surrounded by soccer, as long as Z keeps playing. That makes me glad.

This week should be okay, I don't get to hang out with Steph Monday or Tuseday. That sounds pathetic. Haha. We usually get to hang out every day though for at least 30 minutes. I can live though. Things scare me soemtimes. Like seeing others loose/strugle/not understand their faith. It takes away from me a little bit each time. However, to see that moment of recovery, of regainment, and rejoice is all worth it. Hopefully it comes sooner then later though.

Whateva whateva life is still good. Lent is going... decently. I've been letting my praying knees get way to lazy though. I can't get as close with God as I once was and sometimes that... is a little.... weird. Time to go watch Zukie play COD until I haveta go to bed. I'm legit gunna be dead tomorrow. It's gunna be brutal. Only like a month or so though until Spring Break. Dats rightttt. Oh junior year....


Godspeed.