Monday, April 12, 2010

The sun starts to fade.

Emily: It's like a canoe.
Lorelai: What's like a canoe?
Emily: Life. You're just paddling along in a canoe.
Lorelai: Mother have you been in a canoe? I just can't picture you in a canoe.
Emily: Lorelai, your father and I have been paddling a canoe together for years, only now, he's dropped it. He just dropped it. Not only that but now the canoe is going in circles. Without your father there I'm paddling and the canoe is going in circles, and the harder I paddle the faster the canoe spins and it's hard work and I'm getting tired.
Lorelai: Dizzy I would think.
Emily: You are in a kayak. You know how to do all of this.
Lorelai: How does that put me in a kayak?
Emily: Kayaks have paddles on both ends. You steer it by yourself.

Emily: You're independent. You provide for yourself.
Lorelai: I am kayak. Hear me roar.

The cold weather has vanished from the majority of Florida but continues to hover over everwhere I step. Someone, someone with an unbreakable bond in my life has stepped out, and left a cold spot there. Maybe it's always been there, but I can't tell. I can't tell what I feel or what I want to feel. I am lost. There are things in my life that are clear, but nothing is crystal. Then there are the foggy things. So many foggy things. Then Slam Bam, as if the Lord has blessed us he spewed an angel out of his mouth and sent him right into my life. I have no idea what is occuring in my life. I don't know where it's going. I don't know where I'm going.

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